phone sex?

A few months back I started talking to one of my college crushes. Since the blog is new, I'll have to start at the beginning. G was my first crush of college. We met the first day of freshman year and instantly became friends. We had four years of being really good friends with some sporadic hookups in there. Those stories will come later. But regardless, we have a history together. Now, G and I literally live across the country. When we reconnected, we hadn't spoken in over a year. Thanks to technology, I was able to send G a drunken text message and that's how all of this started.

At first it was great to catch up with an old friend. But then we started talking longer and more often. And eventually we came to the conclusion that we both had certain feelings for each other - the kind of feelings that involve sex. We had hooked up in college but we'd never had sex with each other. I don't know why - it just never came up. I like to err on the romantic side that deep down we knew we would be together eventually and didn't want to ruin that magically moment by drunken fucking in college. But really guys just want to get laid at any time and place and with any willing vagina.

So the these feelings combined with the distance created a problem. And since I'm in school and he's just starting out in his job (i.e. neither of us have money), plus we both have mega-commitment issues (this is a conundrum in and of itself) visiting each other at that point wasn't going to happen. Which leads to the phone sex. Now, i can get myself into sticky situations, but overall i'm a good girl. I had never had phone sex. I'm not even sure what phone sex really is. I really like this guy and I've had regular human contact sex, so could this be that different? but do good girls have phone sex? will he like me more or less? am i doing this for him or for me? or for us? Does having phone sex make me some kind of whore that he can call when he can't get laid by some random chick he picked up at a bar?

So to figure all of this out I had to go to my resources - my friends - who are about as fucked up as I am. But then... on second thought... I didn't want my friends to even know I was talking to G again. We were chastised for our effed up relationship in college - how bad would I get it if they knew I was having phone sex with him? So i did want any nerd would do. I scoured the internet for information on how to have phone sex. yes i'm one of those people. I even found a website with some key "dirty talk" phrases. It just seems so weird to be like "put that big cock inside me" when i would much rather him actually put his dick inside me instead of talking about it on the phone. I finally caved to the phone sex when I realized I could sit on the couch in my sweatpants and oversized tshirt and say cliched phrases while he jerked off... and he would never know I wasnt in a lace bra and a black thong.

but since this blog isn't about what to do - it's about what not to do - i'll share the embarrassing part. I was at a loss for words at some points during the first phone sex experience, and at some point "you rock my world" came out. And then I had to go back and make sure G realized that I was in fact referencing Michael Jackson. I'm pretty sure talking about MJ during sex is an easy way to make a hard dick go limp.

-M